Moving On
by flipceee
Summary: Bella, I love you. Always have, and always will. Those things I've said before... it made me want to kill myself..." Bella raised her eyebrows and laughed incredulously. "That's the big joke? Oh, sorry. I'm just allergic to bullshit." Oooo. Bitter.R
1. Prologue: Desicions

**DISCLAIMER: Apart from my plot, everything goes to the incredible Stephenie Meyer.**

**A/N: **Okay, so obviously, this is an Edward/Bella fic. Rated T to be safe. I will try my hardest not to make the characters OOC. I might change the title, so this one's temporary. Andd, I would like to thank touchthemoon985 aka Kristan (check out her stories. This girl's got mad skills :D) for beta-ing this chapter. I so owe you the the world.

Setting/Everything else you need to know: First three chapters of New Moon happened. The rest did not, including those Volturi and cliff diving events. Also, Laurent did not have his controversial scene (trying to kill Bella). Nada. He's safe in the Denali Coven. Though, Victoria is still on the run. So far, she is the antagonist. So FAR. The same characters stayed. No one died (apart from James). Time Setting has been set after three years, after Edward left Bella.

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**Decisions**

_Edward_

"It's not going to happen Alice," I growled, glaring at my pixie-like sister. The way she smiled at me—it burned my eyes.

Would it happen? No. Of course not. It—it's impossible! How long has it been, anyway? Three years? Three years. Three pestering years. I am  
sure—I have been—I moved on. And Tanya. I can't hurt her. She has done a lot for me, and I can't, I just can't do that to her.

"It's as if you don't know me and my powers, dearest brother. My predictions come true. Or if you are just playing dumb, I might say that I can see the future."

"It is not always accurate! It can always change!" Alice rolled her eyes dramatically, ignoring my harsh reaction. Ooh. Burn! Thank the heavens she is my sister! If not, she would've been killed centuries ago.

"Whatever, Edward. Deny it all you want, but it's all going to happen. Three years, Edward. It's not that long. I know you. I may not read minds  
but I sure can read your eyes, and of course, the future. No one's stopping you except you. Grow up. I'll be seeing you later,"she said with a weak laugh. She held my shoulder blade and came closer, close enough that our faces were inches apart. "Tanya is a good person. You can't use her for you to forget Bella. You know that's beyond impossible. You still love her."

I sighed impatiently, feeling the heat and darkness that filled my head. This woman is absurd! Her spiteful smile disgusted me. "I—don't—love—her—_anymore_," I said through my gritted teeth. Her smug face fell, together with her hand on my shoulders.

"Sure Edward. Sure you don't." She grimaced,her tone bitter. She turned around, walked away, and stopped as she reached the door. "Carlisle knows, you know. He was the first one that I told all these to. And just so you know, he does not contest to it. He's worried. Worried that you might so crazy that you decide to kill yourself, or whatever that drama is." She paused. "If you haven't noticed, you barely ever spend time with us! All I'm saying is, you've been miserable. And it's hurting us all." With that, she disappeared.

How dare she?? I've been miserable? Hah! How does she know what I've been feeling? Three years is enough for me to forget Bella, and move on. Okay, scratch that. Three years just to move on. It's working quite well, anyway.

Or is it? Yes, it is. I think so, at least.

Besides, it was me who left her! Left her for her own good. For mine, too, and for everyone's sake. For—for us. Our love. Our damned stupid forbidden love.

Three years of nothing, just lies and pretension. Three god-damned years… three years of feeling nothing but remorse for leaving her.

Alice was definitely wrong, when she said that I still love Bella. How many times do I have to reiterate, that the past is past, and what's important is what, and who I have now.

_Tanya.  
_  
In those three years, she has helped me to recover.

But I have not been that bad, right? I have a lot of distractions here in my world. A clean break. It's all I need. Curse Alice for wounding my haughty ego.

I got out of the house and headed for the woods—it is where I usually stay when something is on my mind.

Once I got to my spot under that big maple tree, I laid on the grass. If I were human, I would have shuddered from the cold and wet feeling that touched my back. As a vampire, I won't be able to feel anything physically. A vampire who has fallen in love with a feeble human being. A human,who was meant for killing. I sighed at the thought. I placed my arms under my head, and closed my eyes, secretly enjoying the cold breeze. I tried to reminisce, everything that had happened to me four years ago.

Four years ago, my life resided in Forks, where humans annoyed me more than ever. Then came this girl. The chief's daughter I intended to kill her  
because of her unusually addicting scent. But I left. I left because I don't want to be a killer, despite of what I am. I came back. I was then sure that I would not harm her. Days turned into weeks before I discovered my profound feelings for this awfully beautiful human, who was  
supposed to be my prey. It was then that I found out she returned my feelings. I was immensely auspicious that very moment. The way her lips tasted. I loved it. Being in her arms. Bella and I had gone through a lot. She did not care for what I am. She—she really, truly loved me. I loved her so much— so much that I would do anything to keep her safe and happy. Until, it came to the point that I had to leave her. Saying those bitter words of lies made me feel sick. I wanted her to be safe. Safe from me. Safe from what I am. A monster- a bloodsucking monster she should fear.

I left her, sure that I had hurt her. Leaving her made me feel dead inside for the very first time. I had never felt so vulnerable before. Now I know, feelings are inevitable. If I were human, I am sure as hell tears would've formed in my eyes. But no.

Why am I even thinking of this? I have stopped myself from coming back to her. Beg her for mercy to forgive and take me back. This is waggish! Curse Alice for even showing me her damned premonition.

_It's all too late_…

"Do you mind some company?" My thoughts where interrupted by a voice. I opened my eyes, and standing above me was Tanya.

"Oh, not at all," I answered indifferently. I moved a little for her to lay down beside me. She smiled widely as she moved to my side, and took the  
space beside me. This woman is easy to please. Small things I do for her, such as this one, makes her extremely happy. " What brings you here? I thought you were on your hunting trip?" I asked, as I turned my head to face her. She met my gaze.

"Oh, yes, I was. I actually ran onto Emmett and Rosalie. So instead of going to Siberia, I just hunted at the nearest place, and here I am now."  
My eyebrows rose incredulously. "And well, of course, I'm here to see you." A shy smile on her little face.

"Oh," was all I said. I turned my back again, facing the sky, with my eyes closed.

In a short, sudden moment of silence, soft lips brushed mine, and in an instant, Tanys's hands were on my hair.

**x X x **

A few days had passed, and my irritation towards Alice grew into petulant wrath.

"Dammit Alice!" I yelled furiously at her as she looked at me, her eyes teasing.

"Edward!" Esme, my mother, scolded. She moved towards us, glaring with both her hands on her waist. "You two, stop bickering!" I glared at Alice and breathed haggardly as I tried to restrain my fury.

"I'm not doing anything, Mom. I 'm not even talking," Alice said with her puppy eyes. This disgusts me. How I would love to poke those eyes out!

"Oh for the love of all loves Alice! Stay out of my life, will you?" I fumed as I snarled and took a hasty step towards Alice. She didn't even flinch. Instead, she smile trimly. She shifted her gaze to Esme.

"Don't worry Mom, Edward and I will talk about this. We're sorry. You can go meet Carlisle now. He's at Fronk's." Esme looked at us skeptically and raised her head.

"Okay. You'd better. Right. I'll be going now. Emmett and Rosalie will be home tonight. See you in a few days. No fighting." Alice and I both gave  
mom a peck on her cheek before she left. Suddenly, my anger vanished out of the blue.

Joy. Jasper's here.

"I felt your anger, Edward. Would you please chill? I have to study, and not to be disturbed. If you don't mind. Alice, Edward, keep it down, will  
you please?"

"Okay darling. We're sorry." Alice kissed him, and then he went to his room upstairs.

Alice kissed him, before he went up to his room. She turned around abruptly. "Listen, Edward. I don't want you to suffer. You are my brother,  
and I love you. I'm doing all this not to insult or piss you off. I just want to help you. I've seen it, you've seen it. No one's lying here. Who  
are you kidding? You still love Bella, and there's nothing wrong with it. It's my first time in three years to see the future with her in it. And that's  
a good thing, because I know that she's safe with you. So Edward, stop it. Stop fooling yourself. Stop hurting yourself."

**x X x**

Emmett came in my room with a huge grin on his face. I wonder what he wa—he knows it too. Dammit.

"I don't want to talk about it," I said bluntly. I was ready for his harassing questions. Reading minds definitely makes my life a lot easier. Emmett's face fell. He scowled.

"It's so unfair. Everyone knows, except for me. Awe. That's bull shark!"

Alice. She is so dead. I plunked on my couch and groaned loudly.

"Okay, never mind. So I'm going to tell you about our trip." I read his mind. Rose met this brunette girl who happens to be living in Egypt…

"No," I said sternly, glaring at my brother. What is with the world today, enlightening, or rather helping me with my personal love issues???

"Come on Edward! The girl's got some hots! She's awfully better than Tan—" I had to cut him off. This is absurd.

"She's an Egyptian, Emmet! I am not interested." Emmett looked at me with chagrin.

"Egyptians are hot! Besides, Bella—" I grimaced at his utter ludicrous comment. I sat up, and stiffened my back, as I tried to avoid his eyes.

"Sorry," He blurted out, and, in a blur, he disappeared out of my room.

**x X x X x**

"What will Esme and Carlisle say if they find out their favorite son—who's birthday happens to be now—is no where to be found?" Rosalie shook her head and sighed in exasperation.

"What will we tell them?" Emmett interrupted. The tension in the room got even worse when Alice spoke.

"Don't have to worry? Are you insane Alice?? How could we not worry??!! Our brother is no where to be found, and you're telling us not to  
worry??" Rose ranted brusquely. She walked to the couch, sat, and crossed her legs dramatically. Emmett followed her with a smug grin and sat beside her, as he placed his arm around her.

"Easy there, 'hun," He cooed. Jasper appeared out of no where, and the mood enlightened at some point.

"Thanks," Alice said complacently as Jasper wounded his hand on hers. Suddenly, the back door opened and footsteps were heard. The two, Rosalie and Emmett froze in stupor, their faces cold and hard. Carlisle and Esme walked in the living room with their faces uplifted. "Hey Carslile, Esme," Alice said naturally, standing before them.

Carlisle nodded with a smile, while Esme's face suddenly turned rigid and tense as she scanned her eyes through the room.

"What's with all the hard faces?" Carlisle asked suspiciously.

"Edward?" Esme mumbled, but was heard by everyone at the room.

"He's gone," Rosalie snapped. Alice turned her head and looked tersely at the blonde.

"Alice?" Esme asked, her voice weaker.

Alice shook her shoulders and sighed exasperatingly. She looked at everyone with piercing eyes. "Edward is old enough to take care of himself. You guys don't have to worry. Not at all. Trust me at this one."

Carlisle looked at Alice. "Is he—?"

She nodded her head and smiled stirringly. "Bella."

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**A/N: **Tell me what you think about this chappie. No flames PLEASE. Hits and reviews are always appreciated.


	2. Company

**DISCLAIMER: It's all Stephenie Meyer's.**

**A/N: **So I was supposed to post this earlier (this morning) but then I was at school and we only had one hour to do stuff... So yeah. Anywhoo, this was a bit late. I didn't know how to start it. But then, I hope I still made an okay job. Also, I won't be able to update in a while because I have to prepare for our thesis defense crap. Oh, and of course, all will not be here if it weren't for the fab Kristan =) And by the way, I changed the story to Rated M.

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**Company**

_Bella_

Two more years, and I'm finally graduating. Oh. That's a relief. I must say college has been a huge pain in the arse. It's a lot worse than being in stupid high school. It's a good thing though, that Angela goes to the same college as I. A lot of people offers me friendships, but seeing that they would just use or treat me as a dummy, I ignore them. Also, a lot of guys has been asking me to go out with them, but I turn 'em all down.

What _else_ would I do?

I am a legal, mature adult already. Being twenty years old has a lot of advantages, not that I abuse them…

"Miss Swan, do you care to answer?"

"Bella, snap out of it," Angela hissed. I shook my head, lost in my thoughts. I took a peek on my notebook. I looked under my table, and Angela was holding a small piece of paper.

"Plasma proteins," I answered naturally. Professor Davis _humphed_ and then turned around to write on the board.

"Day dreaming?" Angela asked in a low voice. Good thing, we were seated at the far end of the laboratory.

"No. Just thinking," I mumbled. Anaphysiology has always been my weakest link ever since the semester started. I used to be good in Science, but this… This is new. Odd though, I still get high marks on this cursed subject.

Three hours of this dreadful subject is like staying in a torture chamber. _Ugh_. Two years. _It's not that long…_

**x X x**

"So you're moving?" Angela's voice was careful. She walked closer by my side and tugged my arm. I wasn't paying attention to what she was saying earlier. So, I stopped walking, and turned to my side to face her.

"Pardon?" I asked absentmindedly.

"Chief Swan told my father. You're leaving, and you won't even tell me?" Oh. She knows. I am so going to have a word with my father. But still, she deserves to know. Angela's the only _true_ friend I have.

I sighed heavily and pulled her hand gently, to a corner. "I'm going back to Jacksonville next year. Ang, you don't have to be sad or anything. I was going to tell you soon, but not _this _soon." I tried to sound comforting, and energetic at the same time, but I guess it didn't work out so well.

"Oh," Angela's face was burning. Charlie! I groaned loudly and whipped my palm on my forehead.

"Ang, look, I do _not_ want to leave either. But, I have to. Renee needs me and have to be with her—"

"Sure," she interrupted. "See 'ya," this is so not good.

**x X x**

I walked my way to the parking lot. Once I got to my truck, I reached for the key inside my shoulder bag, until an arm wrapped around my waist. At least, there was one _thing _that's extremely sentimental in my life.

I smiled widely, and even felt my cheeks burn because of excitement.

"Happy anniversary," Jacob kissed my hair and wrapped both his arms around me. It felt so good, being safe in his arms. Physically, I enjoyed his touch… The tenderness of it. His broad, yet soft, and warm skin, it all made my heart jump. I felt nothing but bliss, for this boy whom I love dearly.

I untangled his arms around me to face him. Once we met each other's eyes, a blush crept on my face. I felt it redden.

"Something wrong?" Curiosity crossed his almost perfect face. I shook my head once.

"Just happy to see you. A week without you Jacob? It was excruciating," I stared at him and cupped his face. Jacob smiled widely and held my right cheek.

"Well, I'm here now," He cooed, as he smiled crookedly at me. Oh, how I wish he knew how much my heart melts and head spins whenever he does that. It might be awkward, for some, because I was older than Jake. At first, I had double minds about our relationship, and us going public, but then later, I realized I was so stupid to think that. What the hell, I love this guy, and there's nothing anyone could do about it. Besides, he looks older than me. But not that /old/, just enough for a normal boy-girl relationship image. Though the odd thing was, he grows so fast… very fast. It was peculiar, but I really don't mind.

"I'm sorry,"

Obviously, I wasn't paying attention to what he was saying. I was too busy_ studying_ him. "I'm sorry what?" I asked in deep curiosity. He dropped his hand from my cheek and looked at me in disdain. Have I done something wrong?

"I'm sorry I could not be with you today. My father got me to do these crazy things, and I—well, I can not be there," he said bitterly. The flutter in my heart suddenly vanished.

"Oh," Jacob clenched his fists at his side and grunted. "I mean, it's okay. I completely understand," I tried to. Not that I was being hard and selfish, I simply wanted to spend the whole, well, actually, the remaining day with him since it was our special day after all.

Jake sighed heavily and ran his hand through his hair. "I promise to make it up to you tomorrow."

"Sure," I agreed. I hope my frustration wasn't that obvious. I wanted him, so much. So much, that if he'd be gone once more, I' totally go insane.

I closed my eyes, as I felt his hot breath nearing me. In a quick second, Jacob's lips touched mine. His soft, luscious lips wrapped mine. Feeling all the pleasure and the satisfaction I could possibly need, I crushed myself into him greedily, and locked my arms around his neck.

It wasn't hard at all, reaching up to him. I had grown at least two inches—until now, enough for me to level with his six feet one tallness. I locked my fingers on his short hair.

I enjoyed his kisses, and paid no attention to people watching us do our… _thing_.

Jake deepened the kiss by sliding his tongue through my parted lips. I felt some kind of weird, aroused feeling. I pulled him, closer to me, our bodies connected. His hands left my back and traveled down—down that he reached up to my short skirt. Suddenly, he pulled away.

I felt dizzy, as he pulled his lips from mine. I wanted more. I _needed_ more. He grinned and snickered lightly. I twitched my eye brows as I was confused. "What?" I asked. I plained my skirt, moved a little forward, away from my truck.

"We're carried away," I loved to watch his lips move… I'm more than overwhelmed to be with this guy. I smiled at that thought.

"Yeah," Jake placed his hands inside his jeans' pockets.

"Hmmm… And people are watching. But I don't care. You satisfy my…_needs_," I saw a hint of lust in his eyes. Awesome. He was feeling that _too_. "I've got to go though. Billy's meeting me downtown. We won't be in the reservation until tonight." I reached for my keys in my bag once again. Once I got it, I looked up at him once again.

"Oh, cool. I'll see you tomorrow then," I smiled and reached up to give him a smack on his lips. When I pulled away, he took me back and placed his mouth near my ear.

"Don't wear your skirts without me. You're leaving _dumbarse_ guys here breathless and drooling," I dropped my eyes and touched my burning face. "I'll see you," he said once again.

For the last time, Jacob hugged me tight, pulled away, and then left. I opened the door, put the keys in the ignition, and started the car.

It was only three o' clock. My schedule for today was _wide_, so , I had the chance to go home early. Since Charlie wasn't at home yet, and I am not with Jake on our special day, I went straight to the famous park near Forks. I used to play there when I was a little girl. I parked my truck, and sat on the bench. This was a good time to have some time for my self.

Right now, I am very happy. Ecstatic, actually. Having friends, a very wonderful boyfriend, and or course, ever loving parents, whom I love so much…

I was no longer the maladroit girl whom everyone knew at first. It's actually the opposite right now. As if, everything has fallen to its right places. But the best thing I've got in my life—almost the best—was Jacob. Man. I have never expected _us_ to be. He picked up all the broken pieces of me, and put 'em all back together. I changed because of him. Charlie was so overjoyed when Jake and I told him about us. Even Renee. She was just so happy for me. Finally moving on. That was good, very good. Both my parents approve of Jacob.

_My Jacob._

**o O o**

Bella stayed in the park for a few more minutes. Once it was already four o' clock, she got to her truck and drove home. It was a bit on her way to her house, and finally arrived at arounf quarter to five.

She parked her car in the garage, and was a bit confused or rather surprised that Charlie wasn't at home yet. Usually, during Thursdays, he would come home early 'cause he always knew Bella cooks what he calls 'table d' hote' for him.

Bella took the keys of the house, and opened the front door. Upon entering, she opened all the lights of the house, since it was already mid-dark. She planned to go take a cold shower—to refresh herself—and afterwards, cook Charlie's dinner.

Feeling tired and exhausted, Bella walked idly to her room, like a drunkard. She opened her door, and closed it as she walked in. She turned the lights on.

Her eyes flew wide and open.

Dulled and stupefied. Bella's breathing stopped, and her back stiffened.

_Edward_.

Standing by the window pane was Edward. In the flesh. His god-like figure dazzled Bella. It seemed surreal…a dream, or even a nightmare. Three years without seeing that face. Three _long_ years.

Edward has never felt so happy in his whole existence. Seeing the girl he loves so much made feel so alive after being_ dead_ for a long time. She was different, but same kind of different in a kind of way. Her brunette hair grew longer—it almost reached her waist. Her side bangs made her look younger as ever. Her light make up was just perfect.

She was a perfectly debonair woman. Her perfect body figure… it was frustrating! Everythig about her was perfect! And those bloody attractive legs—it aroused him. Edward smirked to that.

He walked swiftly towards Bella. In a blink of an eye, he was right there, standing face to face with her. Bella moved a little backward and hit the wall lightly. Her face was still guarded, still dazed, and her palms placed against the wall.

_Maybe she too was surprised and happy to see me here_. Edward thought. He bent a little, looking down at Bella's warm brown eyes. How he had missed those eyes so much.

"Bella…" he whispered hotly in her eyes. Edward pulled his face to face her once again. In a few seconds of staring at those brown eyes, Edward cupped Bella's face, leaned closer, as he breathed haggardly. "Bella…" he whispered once again, now their mouths mere inches apart.

Longing hard for those soft, luscious lips, Edward pushed his lips against Bella's. He parted her closed lips through his moving tongue. Feeling all the urgency he could possibly get, Edward grabbed Bella's hands and placed it around his neck. He deepened the kiss, but to his frustration, Bella still wasn't returning the spur he was feeling.

He knew he was crossing own lines. But he did not pay attention to that. What Edward cared most about was being with the one true person he loved so much.

Edward's hands traveled from Bella's face to her back, and then held its place on her hips. It almost surprised him, when he felt Bella's lips move against his.

Her hands gripped Edwards hair and pulled him closer to her. In a swift movement, Edward took Bella into his arms, and carried her to her bed without breaking the kiss…

It seemed so perfect. A romantic scene that lovers would enjoy watching. But it was wrong. So wrong. But what's surprising is that, neither stopped. Both wanted to feel the pleasure and lust. Both wanted each other.

Or was that really the case?

Bella removed Edward's shirt and threw it on the ground. He touched his cold body, caressed it while Edward slid his hands through her skirt.

Neither pulled away.

Maybe, neither would.

"Bella, I'm home," Charlie.

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**A/N:** Please please please, read and review: ) hits and reviews are appreciated. No flames! : )


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